Un-Un-Cat, Episode 17. — A WARNING From an Aspergers Spectrum Point of View for the 2020 Primaries.
Note added December, 2021 It’s well after the primaries and the 2020 election now, if you don’t want to re-live any of it skip this next episode. It was a prediction made, written and posted in April 2019.
I’m leaving this episode as is, for my own amusement. Just like I left the lame joke ‘Please Vote, Thanks’ I posted November 7th, 2016 the day before THAT election Tuesday.
I have a “funny” sense of humor, here’s the link to the next episode. Un-Un-Cat, Episode 18. — The Untimely Impeachment. P.s. No, I didn’t imagine Congress would impeach 45 twice.
Please, sort the data and do the math. — How many American voters are going to have an opportunity to make an informed decision on who to vote for in 2020? This is my fear prediction and I hate to tell you this, but we don’t have a Cat running for President, we have something far worse. What is singular for imbecile oligarchy? ‘Enfant terrible’.
After the February 3rd, 2020 Iowa caucuses, two stereotypically average news anchors with perfect hair sit side by side at the bright mostly blue, and white TV set desk reading from flat screens as prompters. For the 11% of American voters who don’t have internet, the lame-stream-media on the good old TV news is the only information about politics they will have access to, especially if they are in one of the towns where the local newspaper has gone digital or gone away completely. Since 2018 the national employment by newspapers has dropped 25% The largest news industry drop, in US newspaper history.
Worse, the presidential debates are going to be behind network TV paywalls, and only 44% of households with a TV can afford expensive cable TV subscriptions.
“Barb,” Ken says, “The Democrats are using remote caucusing via secure teleconference this year and the Republicans are not. What do you think about that?”
“Wow, Ken,” Barb says with fake enthusiasm. “We are using remote feeds to follow along with many of the local gatherings.” She waves at the row of video feeds on the screen behind them like a blonde game show hostess waving at a letter board.
“We have some very interesting numbers here,” Ken says.
“Yes-we-do.” Barb agrees.
“Yes, historic. We have a five-way tie. 17 to 19% for five Democratic hopefuls!” Ken shakes his head chuckling a little, “Is that unprecedented or what?!”
“I don’t know Ken. But, the results are really close.” She nods ‘yes’.
“Yes. I can’t wait to see what happens in New Hampshire tomorrow.” Ken grins showing his perfect white teeth.
Barb, nods ‘yes’ again and says. “Undecided Iowa caucus attendees have been shuffled into groups, they have ‘realigned’ and counted for delegates three times. It’s exciting. We have two women candidates and a couple people of color, um if you count Asian as a person of color. I do. Do you count Asian Americans as a person of color Ken?”
“Yes, he is our first Asian American candidate.” Ken grinned again and blinked a couple times while the network jingle played.
The networks were doing their best to ignore the Republican caucuses. Journalists were tired of the President. The never-ending battle, round and round the ‘Orange-One’ yelling at them about being “the enemy of the people!” Meanwhile, the 400 plus pages of FBI investigation files and if POTUS’s tax returns mattered or not, had bounced back and forth from the House to the Senate only to get kicked back again, until everyone in the country was starting to get an obstruction somewhere.
Worse, the incumbent wasn’t winning. Many true long-time Republicans were digging at history like a dog hunting for a lost bone. They were excavating a war-trench in time all the way back past Reagan to the first Republican president, Lincoln himself. The “straw poll” at the Republican caucus had POTUS running in second place. 52% had written in U.R.Green. The majority were ashamed, only 26% had written in the incumbent and 22% had written in the third candidate.
“U.R.Green is U.G. That’s the same person right? They are just getting her, her name wrong.” Ken double checked with their expert. “It’s a fluke, the president didn’t win the 2016 Iowa caucus either.”
Both Ken and Barb turned to stare at the large screen, showing the line up of the three Republican candidates' faces. Catching each other looking at the fuzzy face and green Cat eyes of U.G.’s official campaign photo, they turned to face the camera. Neither of them wanted to be the newscaster who first accidentally blurted out that she was a Cat running for president.
“U.G. she’s… she is ah… She’s so unusual.” Barb said.
“Yes. Whoever would have imagined that ah, ah…. moderate Republican would be so popular.” Ken shook his head vigorously ‘no’!
Barb nodded ‘yes’. “What can we say about her? Is she single? … Ha ha, ha, ha.”
“My experts are telling me that U.G., ahem, U.R. Green is single and the last president elected who was not married was Grover Cleveland in 1886.”
“Wow…” Barb joined in. “President Cleveland was married in his first term, in the white house, to a 21-year-old. The youngest 1st lady in US history!”
Both Barb and Ken giggled and they and most the mainstream News media wrote off U.G.’s clear lead in the Iowa caucus just like that.
While New Hampshire wasn’t a tie, two out of three of the Democrat candidates over the 15% required by the state to be a viable candidate on the ballot to run for president were members of Iowa’s five-way tie and one was not.
California and Texas, the heavy-weights on Super Tuesday had opposing results. The Democratic primaries in CA and TX mirrored each other, one state graphic inverted with opposite candidates in their lead numbers on a merged chart formed a perfect yin and Yang ( except it was the two top candidates versus each other with two ladies and a third male candidate to fill in the yin).
Democratic primary winners ping-ponged from state to state; the front runner rarely the same. The numbers to earn delegates for the top three in the East were leveled by the top four in the West. The heartland states and the Bible-belt each picking their own favorites. Florida was the worst; not a tie, but a seven-way-conflict knocking all out as viable candidates. In 2016 the problem was too many candidates and most didn’t like any of them. In 2020, there were also too many candidates but, people really liked a handful of them, a lot, and tended to stay loyal once they had made up their minds for their top pick. The National Democratic convention was certainly not going to be boring.
U.G. was the only candidate with the numbers leading to a clear path to a party nomination. She knew she was the scapegoat, the safety valve for the Republican party and she faced the growing masses of gerrymandered voters with an open mind. Her campaign team developed a system for collecting their concerns and sorted comments and other feedback by topic and again each subject was weighted, good versus hate, out of necessity. For better or for worse, she heard what they had to say, she listened and she sorted the data and did the math. She understood a fair portion of why they were angry, from her own experience of being kicked off the Idaho State Representative primary ballot as an independent from 2011 till 2015. 25 states were still suffering under similar voter suppression laws like the ones implemented in Idaho in 2010.
U.G. made a very boring get out and vote video, but it went viral in part because she was in the lead. Many more watched the video and shared it with friends because of the “yanny or laurel” effect. There was a scrolling reader board, subtitles for the hearing impaired, but, while everybody who could read, could read what she was saying a few people ONLY heard “meow, meow, meow”. Most people heard the gist of what she was saying, but also heard a meow, meow in-between the words here and there. Lastly and the most contentious of the three camps, a few people not only didn’t hear any meows, they couldn’t see her as a “Cat”, they only saw a very average looking middle-aged lady with curly hair and green eyes say this.
“Hi, everyone If you don’t already know, my name is Utah Robin Green, folks who know me call me U.G. Today I’d like to talk about voter suppression in the US.
Did you know, just eight years ago 50 million eligible Americans voters could not cast a ballot in the 2012 presidential election because they were not eligible to vote?
Another 12 million Americans were denied their right to vote because of minor problems with their registration. Errors like a misspelling in their name, or someone forgetting to type in their middle initial, or a Mr. instead of Mrs.
The 24th Amendment of the US Constitution states. The right of citizens of the United States to vote in any primary or other election for President or Vice President, for electors for President or Vice President, or for Senator or Representative in Congress, shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or any State by reason of failure to pay any poll tax or other tax.
We all know the cost of fixing a messed up voter registration or getting an error fixed on our ID card far exceeds the hurdle of a dollar and fifty cents poll tax in 1964!
People being denied the right to vote is wrong! — Everybody eligible to vote in America, check your voter registrations right now. Make sure your ID is up to date, double-check your address. Mark the date, know the hours and location of your polling place. And if you are going to be out of town make sure your absentee ballot is set up and ready to go vote.
America let’s Vote in 2020!”
